In the blink of an eye...it can happen to any of us

So much has gone on in a week, one right after the other. I keep it all up to date on social media so it gets daunting to relive it here too. But the one thought I had this past  week is the phrase in the blink of an eye.

 Bear got very sick last Saturday morning and threw up a couple small rocks. I surmised [wrongly] he had eaten the rocks to try to throw up something else he had eaten-which on a farm can be a myriad of things. He wouldn't eat and was morose and clearly uncomfortable. I knew it would be 24 hours to pass something so we watched him closely all Saturday into Sunday. On Monday he tried to poop but nothing came out, so I called the vet and got him right in. The x-rays showed he had rocks in his large intestine and once into the surgery the vet had to take out a large portion of his small intestine that was dead. We knew one scenario was he might not come our of surgery if the intestine could not be repaired. His section that was damaged died so fast. In the blink of an eye. Bear had a long 4 hour surgery in which two parts of his intestine were sewn together. Then he went to spend that first night under supervision at the emergency clinic. Then he went back to spend the entire day at the vet for observation and drugs, and then I got to take him home even though he wasn't eating. He made it this far and is now just starting to get an appetite. Once seven days have passed we will be a bit more relaxed. But we wonder if he is a changed dog. Of course he is still uncomfortable and on 4 different drugs so is not himself, but he seems very intent to be close to me. 

The vet said if I had waited on more day he would have died of septic. In the blink of an eye. I've had labs eat weird stuff, and other dogs eat weird stuff and never had this happen so was not that well versed on it. I always saw things pass out of the dog so was not that worried but after 24 hours plus, and with his demeanor, I knew something was blocked. He might have chronic issues for his entire life now. I never saw him eat the rocks. We will most likely muzzle him when we aren't with him outside.

Somewhere in that emergency, I was saying good bye to Marta, my little pirate chicken. She is one of my favorite little Bantie hens, fiercely independent and no fool to anyone. She had seemed to get weak on one side, suddenly, and she is old. She was living in a private suite with the two chicks I allowed her to hatch. I knew when I said good night on Monday she'd be gone the next day, and she was, the little chicks were sitting on her body. I was so glad I let her set on some eggs, it was something she felt she had to do and was programmed to do and she watched over the chicks fiercely, keeping them safe from rats until they feathered out. I will miss her though. I cried over her like a baby since I needed a good cry after the Bear scare. 

One day she was fine, the next not so much. In the blink of an eye.

Then yesterday I went to meet a local couple who have fallen on hard times and need to move. They have a 34 year old donkey and an elder pig and I will be bringing them home to Apifera. The donkey is the sweetest thing, I'm so glad I can help the animals, as well as the couple. They love the animals but can not take them to the city they have to move and they two have health issues and limitations. But they are sad. it is a challenging transition for them to leave the little farm they've lived on for so long. We talked about all the work they had done over the years and all the ways they had struggled to keep the place going. But they couldn't. In the blink of an eye...things can change. I look forward to getting the old donkey on Saturday, but I feel for them and I just hope it helps them some how to know he will be loved and cared for. Their other options were not palatable so somehow I am once again able to help both old animals and older people. I'll share more when they get here.

The time and love we have put into our farm and home is no different than what this couple put into theirs. We might have done it in different ways, but we work hard and love our home...and one day very soon we too will be older and things aren't always in our control. One day you look back and you say...in the blink of an eye...here we are.

Brreaking News: Officer Mittens arrests himself!

 

If you follow us on social media, you know that officer Mittens takes his job seriously. You can hear all about his arrests and citations he gives out on Facebook or IG, but I had to share this one here for my blog readers.

Officer Mittens has arrested himself! He had jailed Bear for eating the cat food but in thoroughly questioning the subject he realized Bear had been the victim of entrapment. Charges for both are pending review once Officer Mittens can consult with his supervisor and consul.

{Officer Mittens now has T-shirts for sale with sales going directly to Apifera.}

When you lose a dog...explore the spaces that are left-that is where the healing and opportunity lies

Some followers are wondering out loud if Bear needs a new dog friend. Perhaps in time. But right now, it is my time to be with Bear. Bear and I were just beginning to evolve into what ever our partnership was meant to be, back last winter when he arrived as a pup. Then the virus took over everyone's life. I am so grateful Bear and I went out right away when he arrived and did therapy visits at Cove's. Our time their together was so important to us, and of course the memories of Bear and John and all the others is a warm spot for me. I've written before, there were times after the virus arrived when I wondered if Bear's main purpose at the time was to befriend John in his final months.

So, back to getting another dog–I expect someday there will be another dog. But right now, Bear and I are exploring the spaces created by Muddy's departure. After someone or something departs, we survivors have to feel the spaces, spaces that are both physical and emotional. It is often painful. But there comes a time in loss when one can see those spaces as opportunities for new encounters, new adventures, new friends...and yes, new dogs.

Bear had a lot of good training early on. He was a smart and calm pup when he went on therapy visits, everyone commented on that, and even I thought I had truly found a born healer. Once the virus took over, Bear was not out socializing with people, he was home with me and Mud, being a pup, a dog. And then at some point, Mud was diagnosed with terminal cancer with weeks or moths to live, so my focus shifted to Mud. While I didn't neglect Bear, I most certainly was heart pointed to Mud, and Bear knew it. So did Mud. I think Mud wanted me to be focused on Bear, so he could let go. At some point I discussed that with Mud, and told him not to worry, that Bear and I would rise again to do good work together.

If I went out and got a dog now, spaces would be filled for Bear, and me, by another dog. Bear and I need to fill the space first.

I've been doing a fun training game with him. Our old house is unusual in that, despite it being built in 1760, each room has two doors, so you can do a complete circle from room to room. So I make Bear sit and stay in a room, then I walk to the next room where he can't see me, and make him wait for my 'come'. It's sort of more like a game this way and is fun.

Bear still becomes the pup I brought home that day, the pup that clung to me with his front legs for many days if he was scared. Bear will still sometimes come to my side of the couch and try to get in my lap like he did as a pup. I tolerate it so long to show him comfort, then make him stop. He is learning to be outside for longer periods while I do chores inside. Initially after Mud died, he got scared. I mean he is only 6 months old.

Bear is allowed to do night chores in the front barn with me. It is is the barn that Marcella lives in and although she can't see Bear when he is in that barn, she knows he is there. Bear can not go in and out of the barn at free will, only if I am there. This is the first house dog I've allowed in a barn like that. Bear can also nose White Dog on the other side of the fence. He has goats, a goose, a Pickles, and he has me and Martyn. And he loves the house cats and often goes to sleep near them, or lick them.

So...that is the update. There are spaces to feel, and we are feeling them. So there will be no new dog for now. Unless, like I said, there comes a knock on the door and a blind one eyed pug with a suitcase shows up.

In which a little dog named Bear loses an old friend, but he's watching

On Monday I got a phone message.

"This is Marge, and I wanted you to know that Bear's friend, John, died on Saturday."

Marge is John's wife of sixty years. John was one of the people we visited weekly at Cove's Edge, and he loved Bear. The feeling was mutual. My followers came to call it "The John & Bear Show" when I'd post photos of the two of them. When I first visited Cove's Edge with Opie, I had seen John in his wheelchair, napping. The next visit, I think I saw him sitting in his wheelchair, outside his room, awake, and most likely waiting for his wife. Marge visited John twice a day, daily. That is what we call devotion and love.

When I decided to get a Lab puppy, I told the breeder I only wanted a chocolate male. As the due date of the litter neared, I wrote her again and told her I was excited, but nervous there might not be a chocolate male. She calmly said,

"These things always seem to work out."

And then, finally, the first pup came out, and she messaged me immediately, with a picture-it was a chocolate male. The rest of the litter was delivered...and Bear was the only chocolate male. I decided that was a sign, and an indicator that Bear was ready to work and come be my therapy dog, and looking back, I believe that more than ever.

When I first brought Bear into the retirement home, he had only been with me a few days, he was calm and a huge hit of course. But as I walked Bear in his carriage down the hall, there was John in his wheelchair, and this time his wife Marge was pushing him. I had never seen John smile in past visits, but when he saw Bear, he had a smile ear to ear. His wife told me how he had had a lab once. I do not know what John's medical issues were, it is not my business, but he could not speak. He was 89. But when he saw Bear, he lit up.

Bear was small enough that he could sit on John's lap. I had a harness on Bear, and a leash, and John had these strong, large hands, and he'd grasp that leash and not let go. As Bear got a bit older, John helped me train him to not use his teeth to nibble, with a sharp little tap on his snout. When other people gathered around John and Bear, Marge would tell him to let others be with the puppy and she whispered to me that she didn't want John hogging Bear. But I didn't care, Bear was met to be with John at this time. I always ended up taking so many photos of the two of them, it was impossible not too, and I'm glad I did.

Unfortunately, a few weeks ago, a stomach virus swept through the facility, so I was not allowed to visit that week. The next week, still shut down, was when the C. virus really began to become a reality. I feared I would not get back there for some time due to the lock down. But I thought of John, and others we visit. I worried he might think we gave up on him and the others. I was anxious to get back. I was able to suggest I bring the llama over and they loved the idea of our window walk outside. It was pouring rain, and there we were walking around with a llama, me and Martyn, my volunteer Polly, and my two care managers who were so great to do it [they needed to get out too]. But I did not see John, and I wished I had made a point to ask for him. I think I was focused on the llama, and by the time we got to that side of the building it was all I could do to keep my glasses from getting wet.

In the three weeks we have been away from the visits due to the lockdown, Bear has grown so much. he would not need his little red wagon anymore, and he could have sat right next to John and he could have petted him. When I found out John died, I was so sad, but so very touched Marge thought to call me directly before I heard. She has no idea how much that meant to me! I chose not to call her back that day, I was afraid I might cry and didn't want to cause pain, so I wrote her a long letter. I will reach out soon.

I told Bear about John too. What I noticed was, he was very calm when I told him. Bear is entering his pre-teen years [he is almost 5 months old!], he is still a very good pup and still very calm and listens [pretty well!] but he is more energized than he was. But on the day I told him, I sat down, and made him sit in front of me, and I said,

"John died."

We sat quietly together like that for just moments.

If Bear had come along a month later, we might not have had this relationship with John. I truly believe his timing was in the stars so he could meet John, and give him some pup love, some smiles, perhaps visceral memories of his past. His past was full! His obituary shows what a full life he and Marge had, all their work together, his music, their fish business, and their camp in New Hampshire where they hiked and skied. John hiked the Presidential Range and worked for the National Forest Service maintaining trails. And he played the sousaphone in many community bands.

Anytime you meet someone, an elder, remember that-they had a long life of 'stuff', the same way you are doing stuff and making a life, they did too. They are not cardboard figures. You've read about me and Martyn doing stuff since we were young pups of 40... and now we are 60...and in a flash we will be like Marge and John...and so will you.

I have to tell you, and I told his wife in my letter, in my work with the animals and elders, there are always one or two people that make a stronger impact on me, that I internally resonate with and find myself gravitating too. I don't question it. But I often know what's coming.

So a little dog name Bear must have heard my intentions back when he was floating in his mother's womb. I like to think he knew, he knew he had to get out as soon as he could, time was of the essence to get here, so he could do what he sensed had to be done immediately...to get to this person named John. Bear was incredibly bonded and trusting of me from day one, more than any dog I've had. He still his, he still looks to me. And the fact he trusted me to go into that home at such a young age after only being with me 4 days says to me he knew what he had to do. As long as I was nearby, he knew he was there to be Bear. And then he met John.

The obituary came out Tuesday, and I read every word, learning more about John's life. And then I choked up, when I saw this: Per John’s wishes, there will be no funeral, and burial will be private. Memorial donations may be made to Apifera Farm, 315 Waldoboro Road, Bremen, ME 04551, whose animal visits to Cove’s Edge in Damariscotta brought tremendous joy to John and the other residents.

It is not about the possible donations, it is the fact Marge recognized how much joy Bear brought, and that our work is appreciated.

Perhaps Marge will appreciate this, but I have found myself saying to Bear, if he is not behaving quite up to snuff,

"Bear, be good, John is watching, he knows."

Well darn it...White Dog back to the vet

The dreaded cone returns

Just two days ago he was free. But yesterday morning sometime White Dog reopened his wound site.

Expletives flew around the barn when I saw it.
ne. I
I knew the good news was the interior skin was healing and looked really good, and it was about 1/3 of the original stitched area that popped open. It was not bleeding. I knew it would heal, but since I had to take Bear in for more shots on Monday morning I opted to take White Dog too. We opted to novocaine the area and clean it and restich that opening. Ben did so good.

So he's back home, on sedation pills again, and wearing the dreaded co'll have him in the barn again for 7-14 days. I'll take him on some short walks to break up the boredom. We've been through too much to take risks. The vet was happy though with the wound area, we just decided after all this why risk an infection.
So keep your hooves and toes crossed that we can get it healed up sooner than later.

"Am I going to get a shot?"

Bear and Opie's Love Mobile keep on rolling

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A post shared by Katherine Dunn / Apifera Farm (@katherinedunnapiferafarm) on Jan 30, 2020 at 12:30pm PST

Every week the staff and residents notice how Bear is growing. I notice it too. I already look fondly at his first photos here, he is growing like a weed but still is completely a pup. He has a beautiful temperment and each visit I think we bond more with people, and I with him. People keep saying how calm he is. Well, I agree, but then I always add,

"Knock on wood."

I think that initial ride home in the truck, on my lap, for 2 hours was a real bonding thing for Bear. He was so timid, and trusted me instantly. He had too. I taught him basic 'sit' immediately, and within a day he was doing it on command, and does so on our therapy visits. He sits well on people's beds too and isn't too ansy-although as I've said before the home is kept sooooo warm and I give him water but at this stage water means piddle breaks outside, which is fine. The hot temperature of the place makes him pant a bit. Panting can mean other things-pain, anxiety, fear...but in this case, I truly think it is the temperature. He is not as bothered in the beginning hour. Some of the private rooms almost take my breath away they are so hot! If I ever end up there I will have to be buck naked at all times.

Opie has sort of taken a back seat in stardom to Bear, but I think he is okay with that. Opie's real talent lies in going up to people that need him most, something he can't do in The Love Mobile. Come summer when he can be in the courtyard he will be free to show his talent again. Will bear follow suit? We will see.

In the past two weeks, three people we visited at the home have died. They were sudden, and fast deaths. The thing is, you don't do this thinking nobody is going to leave. They all leave. I wonder if I could do this if my parents were still alive? It might sadden me in ways I could not fathom now. It's not that I don't feel sadness at times, I do. In fact, I have to treat myself to decompressing after visits, and sometimes I forget that the visits even though enjoyable and full of laughter too, the energy is very strong on some days, around some people. I have to remember that for the animals too. I have a ritual of pulling energy off their backs as I breath it in, then quickly release my hands as I breathe out. I thank the animals for their work that day.

This residence home is a good fit for what I want to accomplish with my work and animals. The staff is helpful and loves our mission. I am getting to know some of the visiting wives, 'The Wives Club" as they are called. I've been to homes that are so depressing the second you set foot in the place. This is not so here. They try really hard to make it full of life, versus bodies waiting. The rooms are rather hospital like, but that is the stage most of the resident are in, this is not a place you go when you are independent, it is the end of the line basically.

Bear and his friend John who used to have a lab and loves Bear

Opie holds court and Earnie talks to him

Even though he can get out, he stays in his basket with my command

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A post shared by Katherine Dunn / Apifera Farm (@katherinedunnapiferafarm) on Jan 30, 2020 at 12:20pm PST

Oh, Lord, these two

Mud split a toenal so I bandaged to stop slight bleeding

"What happened to your foot?" Bear wonders.

"I'll live, don't worry, little fella."

Perhaps the most poignant moment ever

Yesterday I took both Bear and Opie to the elder home for their weekly visit. I wanted to try having both of them there, and I had Polly my assistant volunteer with me and it worked out really well. Opie was in his cart making rounds, and I covered another area of the home with Bear. Again I had his little wagon so when he got tuckered out he could rest.

He did great. I wondered if last week was a fluke but I was so touched by him, and his behavior. He is a bit more puppy like now with another week of living under his belt, but he was calm and focused much of the time. We let him down to walk too and what just slayed me was he would sit on command, watch for me, wait for my next move. We've been working on that in the house-he is rewarded when he is calm with praise and love, when not I ignore him. I've been teaching him tosit, off leash and I couldn't believe it when he was able to be so focused at our visit-everyone ooohed and awed, and I was very proud of him.

But the moment captured in this photo is one of the more poignant moments of my animal therapy career. This is John and last week I told you how he lit up when he met Bear, and that was the first time I'd seen him smile or be animated. He held Bear and just was so happy the entire time. His wife visits him twice a day every day. Well, when we got there yesterday people were excited to see Bear and Opie, and at some point I noticed John and his wife coming down the hall. About 15 feet from us, John saw the puppy and he stretched his arms out, smiling, until he got wheeled up to Bear.

My heart nearly broke into a million pieces.

Opie was treated to a carrot by staff

It's like she was loving him so hard it showed in her face

Se doesn't usually talk a lot

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A post shared by Katherine Dunn / Apifera Farm (@katherinedunnapiferafarm) on Jan 9, 2020 at 1:30pm PST

She always had lots of animals in her life

The man who I never saw smile...laughs with Bear

Earnie looking proudly at Bear

I guess the feeling I had when I took him on his visit....he really gets it, I sense he really understood, just like Opie, this is my intention for you, and you have this in you, and he does. Not every animal is prone to this. It instills what I already voiced...Bear was meant to find me and I was meant to find him at the exact time we did. It's called grace.

I took Bear to Cove's Edge on Thursday for his first outing. I had a secure little red wagon for him if he got overwhelmed. I did not want to overdue it, as he is still very young but I want to acclimate him to the wheel chairs and sounds, and he can begin meeting people. He had no fear there of the wheels.

The first person at the front to greet was was...Earnie! Of course, it was Earnie and that was perfect. Earnie held Bear easily, even with one arm, and it was a good start because bear could snuggle and get used to things. Of course he was a magnet for the staff, who need animal therapy as much as the residents. He was calm, steady, and I must say...focused.

I also was pleased that he knew my voice and knew he was safe.

We went around in the cart and then I'd put him on people's beds or laps. There was not an incidence where he squirmed [this might change as he matures!].

One of my most moving encounters was when a gentleman was wheeled over, by his wife who visits twice a day every day, and I have never seen him smile. He is usually slumped in his chair sleeping, and he can't talk. But when we put Bear in his lap he smiled, and smiled, and held him, petted him looking at him with a smile the whole time. His wife told be they had a lab at one time. That was so beautiful. He did not take his hands of that pup, nor did he stop smiling.

Another gentleman came out of his room to see Bear. I was told he usually does not come out much, but he had owned a pet shop for 30 years. He came to see Bear. It was beautiful too.

I was so proud of him. I really wasn't sure how the day would go and again, I knew it might be a short visit. I did not want a bad experience for him, nor did I want him over handled or over stimulated. But none of that happened. He sat on his last lap after about an hour visit there, and I could see he was getting a bit unfocused, so we put him in the cart and he fell off to sleep. We could still visit with people, but it was hard to get out the door with him-people kept wanting to pet him. I allowed that even though he was sound asleep.

He did great in the car too. He is doing really well with house training thanks to my crate and little pen in the living room. I am up and down a lot and he has not pooped once in the house, thank you Bear, or his crate. His worst hours are 5-6 pm, because it is dinner hour making for us, and he wants to be part of the activity, which he is in his pen by the fireplace, but any activity and I have to get him out to pee. He's getting it though.

The man who I never saw smile...with Bear

Focused on his work

If you don't like puppies look away

Bear at 8.5 weeks

I am in puppy overload, puppy heaven, puppy piddle, puppy joy....so you might want to take a break from all my social media links if for some reason you are adverse to puppies.

Bear has been here 3.5 full days. He is settling wonderfully and his personality is starting to emerge. He is sleeping most of the night, and understands outside is piddle madness area, and inside is piddle oops area. He is doing really well with pooping outside.

I know you wanted to know that.

Anyway, I am a bit distracted, lots of work ahead with him but right now, it is pure joy to wake up to him, to watch him do so many 'firsts' [stairs, vaccuums, television, music, The Goose and much more].

I have told the barnyard that Bear is needing my energy for a bit longer but they are fine, everyone is wel ad we are in a new year of hope...hope...hope for so much.

For now, just enjoy these photos of Bear.

A kind follower sent bear his first snuggly-a Birdie to watch over him

Bear has a crate den to sleep in

Bear explores

I lucked out on this shot of Bear under a watchful moon

He's here!

We picked up Bear today. All I can tell you is I instantly knew he is the right guy. He was glued to me the entire time there and all the way home. He's a very calm [as of today!] pup and seems to be a thinker, he positions himself out of the fray of the litter and watched from background. He likes to sit. Upon arrival, he was pretty scared, a little trebling, tail down a lot, but after a nap in the crate, and some food, he was much more relaxed and puppy like. Muddy has already showed him his tennis ball and it appears he 'gets it'. I am being careful with Muddy since he is ten and even though he's never shown aggression, he has been on his own for a few years since Huck died.

So far, the cats seem interested but not freaked out so that is good. Bear will be allowed on the couch with me [Muddy sits on the other side] and he eventually won't need the crate, but I have always crate trained and find it a good way to teach patience and boundaries. I had to reteach Martyn who understands Bear is my training student, not his. No teaching handshakes! As Bear sat and whined in his crate in the living room, Martyn asked how long we let that go on. I said, "Until he stops and then some" so he learns when he is quiet there is either a nap or a person to let him out for quiet behavior. I can't remember how long I needed the crate with Mud or the others, but I can tell he is figuring it out very fast.

And what a big day for him. I'd cry too! He left his mates [all the litter had been picked up except Bear and one other female] he left his home, he rode in a car for two hours [no accidents and slept in my lap the entire way]...think of waking up one day and everything is new-the sounds, smells, sights...

Mainly, I am just in love and hope to do him proud, and aim to work as a good leader. I was thinking that I've learned a lot about animals and training and behaviors [mine included] since living on the farm. I have trained many dogs, but I feel this will be an important partner in my work, and feel I am more equipped than ever to avoid some pitfalls. I'm excited. I think he is going to be an easy learner [but we shall see!]

I will be posting way too many pictures on Instagram. But who can get enough of him? I can't.

I cherish Bear...already.

The exact dog that is meant to be here, now, in this time, with me

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A post shared by Katherine Dunn / Apifera Farm (@katherinedunnapiferafarm) on Dec 21, 2019 at 9:23am PST

Very soon, very soon...I think one of the reasons I am so excited to bring Bear home is because it will be a working partner to go forward with our work - he will be trained to go to the elder home with me. Opie will continue on his weekly mission [the residents are already pretty in love with him and his little red Love Mobile]. My plan is to begin short excursions with Bear right away...to desensitize him to wheel chairs and other things.

Losing Birdie at such a crucial time in our non profit's elder work was crushing. I think Bear somehow soothes that. Bear will be able to hop in a car and sit on a bed if needed, something I can't do with a goat or llama. The other animals will remian crucial ambassadors of love, rest assured. Opie and Bear will be the go-to love machines though.

I also think the ressidants will love watching Bear grow, and learn, and mature as their therapy dog. They will get a certain sense of ownership of him.

When I saw this video of him from a couple days ago, I really love the way he steps back, sits and looks right into the video screen. I like to think he is seeing me somehow. The fact he was the only chocolate male in the litter, the fact I was waiting anxiously for his birth and he came out first [I only wanted a chocolate male] all lead me to feel he is meant to be The Dog. At first I thought a post Christmas pup might be more difficult with winter weather, but now I realize the timing could not be better for is training. He will have to go inside the elder home since it is winter, he will be able to sit on laps and beds. if we were outside this would not happen. Also, it is like a culmination of the Christmas spirit that wrapped me this year, the first time in so many years I have truly felt the spirit. Martyn and I partook in so many nice things together this past week, and picking the puppy up will be a giant exclamation point to all of it.

I feel Bear is meant to do what he is about to with me at his side. I suppose that could be my wonderfully active imagination again, but I truly sense this pup is meant to come to me, now, and here.

This exact pup.

Stay tuned.

Bear turns 4 weeks old

It's hard not to clutch the screen and smoosh his face. Bear turns 4 weeks old and that's half way to Apifera. I'm grateful the breeder send these update pics to all of us. This week should get fun, as the pups will begin to move around a lot at this stage.

I wake up realizing how life will change for us in-house Apiferians, but in a good way. It's been 10 years since I raised a pup. But I'm up for the newness and wonder of it all, and to socializing him when he is ready. This will be my dog, that is the plan. Although let's not forget I bring cats home from the shelter and they fall in love with Martyn. But I will be the one training him, taking him out, etc.

It is just pure fun to have his photos from these early days in the litter. I love you Bear, we are going to have a lot of fun, and good work with the elders too.

His name is Bear

I've been getting pup pics from the breeder every few days. I can't believe how much he changed since the last video-his eyes are now well opened and he is becoming a real pup versus a little worm lump. Amazing.

When I look into this picture, I feel he is looking right into me, like we are already communicating.

I am so very excited.

And we have named him Bear. I feel like that is going to fit his personality, from what I can already see. Time will tell.

I know he is in good hands, and with his litter mates getting strong and ready for the outside world. But it sure is hard to not be attached already, and want him here to be with us. I want to tell him,

Everything is going to be okay.