Apifera Farm - where art, story, animals & woman merge. Home to artist Katherine Dunn

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©Katherine Dunn.

Sunday, January 13, 2019

To my mom, and yours, and yours, and yours....

Today would have been my mom’s 93rd birthday, it has been 6 years since I saw her in January in '13 on her 87th, and in April of that year she died, suddenly, but in her own home and on her terms. I miss her, of course, but the way I miss her has evolved. I have said before that when a loved one dies, the love they gave, and that I received, somehow expands.

I figure that when a person is alive, they have all this love inside them, like energy, and they dole it out over time…but when the body is done, everything is released and the love expands and it explodes out free to be carried all over and merge with everything-the trees and sky, people, flowers…the air–it’s like air, the love expands and we breathe it daily. I can say that this experience has shown me the power of love, and while I miss her voice and talking to her and hearing her thoughts...I know that it’s all still there, the love.

Last night I dreamt about her and my father, and two of our Westie dogs, we were all together eating dinner somewhere...I have similar dreams a lot. I don’t know if this is my will to want to visit them, or their will to want to visit me...or both...either way...it’s the love again. Everything is connected.