Apifera Farm - where art, story, animals & woman merge. Home to artist Katherine Dunn

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Friday, August 07, 2015

Muddy and my Mother Ship ready for duty

Please take note: I will not be turning this site into The Post Menopausal Farmer on the Run blog.

Muddy is one of my cheer leaders. He is thrilled to walk, anywhere, anytime and turn around and do it all over again. When he looks back at me as we are walking, his look is a combination of pride, joy and sheer devotion-not only to me, but to the day, to the smells of the earth.

When I lived in Minneapolis, I walked over four miles a day, with my side kick, Louie Louie, the fox terrier. It was so easy to take my mid morning walk, put on one leash, hop in the car and drive 5 minutes to one of the lakes and walk. I never gained weight. If I did, I ate extra lean for a day and it was gone. Sigh. Ladies! Do you remember such days?

I realized this past year I've been mourning that body's chemistry too long, and it had me down. That led to feeling down about some other things, and it became a cycle of self loathing and doubt.

Another reason being with Muddy is good, he is never down, ever.

When I moved to the farm, I still walked, but it became less and less with all the other activities. It's funny how people say,

But you live on a farm, you must be in shape from that?

Yea, I am, in many ways. I'm still pretty strong and compared to many 57 year olds - or thrirty year olds- am in descent shape. I've spent so much time in the past eleven years putting the animals first, that some things have crept up on me and my vessel-my beloved body that has held my soul and spirit for my entire life. My Mother Ship has some cracks in it, as aging vessels due, a few leaks, but the structure appears intact. The casual maintenance it has been receiving needs to be adjusted.

I found this wonderful Naturopath licensed doctor and had my visit today. Her office is in a little cottage that sits next to a horse farm. It is not fancy at all, but very comfortable. I felt like I was walking into an episode of Marcus Welby, except everyone was a woman. I had the best doctor visit I've had in years. My last doctor visit was this spring and that doctor-even though she was of my age range-was totally unconcerned about the issues I brought up. We did a blood work, but she did a casual job picking the tests-mainly because she really wasn't listening, I was just another routine women of that age. I walked away feeling very depressed, like nobody really understood what I was trying to communicate about my body changes. So I didn't go back to her. And am so glad I didn't.

Don't worry! I will not be turning this blog into The Post Menopausal Farmer on the Run. I just was so relieved, almost emotional, as I drove away. An hour and half consultation and exam, with no feeling I was being pressured to rush, all questions were answered and there was actual conversation and detail about the issues at hand-as in medical facts, charts, etc. I like facts and science. So now I have a plan for some of the issues we addressed.

So Muddy will be thrilled. We need to increase our walks one way or another by 3x. He will adore me.